The Holidays

So....

I am writing from my new laptop. Yes, my new laptop! While I hinted around that I wanted one for quite a while, I didn't think I would actually get one. I'm stoked, but we are having wireless connection issues. Both our laptops cannot be connected at the same time for some reason. Can anyone help???

Another amazing gift I received was this. The heart has two pearls enclosed, one for each girl. I absolutely love it.

The girls also made out like bandits and received so many gifts from us and their grandparents. They will be outfitted very well over the next six months or so. Beyond that, Bea got a train set that she loves and a tricycle that she is learning to use. For Olivia, I did what my mom used to do for me every year at Christmas. I put a stuffed bear in her bed that she woke up with in the morning.

And Josh. He got some stuff he wanted. His big gift is yet to come. It's just finding exactly the right dirt bike, and we are in no rush since it is winter right now. This summer we are planning a lot of trips with the girls where we can go wheeling and he will also be able to use a dirt bike (he got rid of the one he had when I got pregnant with Bea). Oh yeah, it is going to be busy around here with doing that and going to four weddings in 2007, but it's nice to be busy. And I am sure the girls are going to have a blast...as they get older it gets funner and easier.

I am a little sad that the holidays are coming to a close, but we have next year to look forward to, of course. We never got our holiday cards out (SORRY!) and the girls didn't visit Santa and get their pic taken (though I think it would have freaked them both out this year). We will have to plan better next year.

***One last note is that I only get/purchase about 4 CD's per year these days. Well, for Christmas, Josh got me the new JT. It does not disappoint. Sure, you may laugh that I like the poppy stuff, but I can't resist. And seriously, JT DOES NOT DISAPPOINT! (And neither does Beck - Yes, Mitchell, I will have it waiting for you here as well on Friday.)

Ok, here's the part you were probably waiting for. Some pics, but the good Nikon one's are yet to come:

The Mimicker

A real live event that took place this evening:

I am in the bathroom with Bea as she is finishing up her bath and getting ready to dry my hair.

Bea: Mama. All Done. Ready get out.

Jenna: You're ready to get out?

Bea: Yes.

Jenna: (Calls to Josh as he was going to get her out of the bath) Josh!

Bea: Josh!

Jenna: (Calls to Josh again) She's ready to get out. Did you hear that?

Bea: You hear that?

Josh comes to the bathroom.

Josh: Yeah I heard her.

Bea: Josh. Josh. Josh. Josh. Josh.

Josh: Do you hear that?

Jenna: Yeah, I hear that.

Bea: Josh. Josh. Josh. Josh. Josh.


And earlier that day:

Jenna: Josh.

Bea: Josh.

Jenna: Who's Josh?

Bea points to Josh.

Jenna: Josh is daddy.

Bea: Yeah, Daddy.

Jenna: Jenna.

Bea: Jenna.

Jenna: Who's Jenna?

Bea points to me.

Jenna: Jenna is Mama.

Bea: Yeah, Mama.


Anyway, I guess my point is that instead of just being careful with our language around her, we have to be really careful. No more potty mouth words starting with an "s" or an "f". It's scary what is coming out of that girls mouth these days. Sentences. And more sentences like this one:

"Oh, Mama. Bow-Wow. Where's Bow-Wow? Oh, I'll get him, Mama. I'll get him."

And this one:

"I'm sorry, Bow-Wow. I'm sorry. You ok? Oh, good Bow-Wow."

Don't get me started on the one directly above. That's a long story and one for another day...

Oh, and Bow-Wow = Bea's stuffie that she can't live without.

Olivia at 10 months

Dear Olivia,

Today you are ten months old. In the last month you have really appeared to become your own person.

You're still not crawling, but I think we are getting there. You are scooting around on your back and when we put you on your tummy, you will stay there for awhile now without getting too upset. You're not moving yet, but I think in the next month we might see some action on that front. One thing you started doing that you absolutely love is jumping. Your jumper has now been put to use and you have become a little jumping bean. Your sister will stand next to you and jump along with you, so it makes you much more motivated to jump.


This month you took your first plane ride. We flew down to Orange County to see my side of the family, and you were a great flier. You spent the whole time on my lap on the way down there just playing with your toys. On the way back, you slept on your father most of the time. You were a good traveler in spite of coming down with a fever, but you didn't appear to be too upset about it. We did have one bad night where you just couldn't get comfortable and whined almost the whole night. We felt bad for you, little Livey.

Last night when I brought you home from daycare I was talking to your sister and I said "Uh-oh". Somebody said "Uh-oh" back. I looked at your sister and she was just staring at me. So I said it again. I heard "Uh-Oh" again, only it wasn't coming from your sister, but coming from you instead. So then I said it ten more times and heard your response ten more times, too. Your father was on his way home from work, so I called him and tried to get you to do it. You got shy. I'm sure you don't know what it means, but that's ok. You also say "DaDa" quite frequently, and you have said "MaMa" as well. It's nice that you are saying these things, and I am looking forward to you understanding what they actually mean.


You also had your first Thanksgiving feast ever. You did such a great job...eating up the green beans, having some potatoes, and a little bit of stuffing. The family enjoyed having you around, and you enjoyed trying to keep up with your sister and nieces.


Little Livey, I see you growing right before my very eyes. I'm happy, but at the same time I am getting sad. Once you start crawling, it's bye to my little baby. And I know a few months from now you and your sister are going to be off playing together. I'm enjoying catering to you for as long as I can, because I really enjoy you and the time I spend with you. As each day goes by, you are a little bigger, a little stronger, and a world of more fun. You're still my sweet little bunny rabbit, and you always will be.

I love you,
Mama

Fa La La La La...

I’m trying to find the right words for how this weekend went…and I’m struggling. Seeing both sides of my family was absolutely wonderful. The travel, well it wasn’t too much fun.

In case you are wondering, nope, Bea didn’t run up and down the aisles of the plane screaming like I thought. She stayed put in her seat and loved being on that plane in the window seat. It was being in the airport that wasn’t too appeasing to her. All those people, plus too much stimulation and anticipation for what was to come next. I do have to say that getting there was a lot easier than getting back. Upon finding out last Friday that we needed to supply birth certificates for them to fly on this particular airline, we tore apart the house on Friday afternoon looking for them. I thought we got them, but instead it was their social security cards that we received. When we checked in on Friday, they let us through – it was an issue, but it wasn’t that big of an issue…You see, they only want those birth certificates for those that “appear” they might be over the age of 2, requiring the purchase of an extra ticket. Bea is 23 months, and because she is borderline, they questioned it. No question about little Miss O, though.

However, on our way back was a completely different issue. We were hoping there weren't going to be any problems, and of course there were. After a short nap on the way to the airport, both girls were awoken (not by choice) as we dropped off the rental car and headed into the airport. As we got to the head of the line I was hoping for a nice person to check us in, and she looked nice enough. But, she wasn’t. Had to grab her manager because of all these strict guidelines, apparently. They wanted something, needed proof, or we were going to have to buy Bea a separate seat for the plane. After Josh complained and complained some more, they were not giving in, so he tried to call the hospital where she was born to get someone from the medical records department tell them she was under 2! They said they could call her doctor office, but of course there is no one there on the weekend. We were screwed. And during this whole time, not just one, but both girls were cranky because they had short naps. So they were crying and I was trying to calm them down. Bea only wanted Josh, but he was occupied with the matter at hand. She was so upset I thought she was going to throw up. And in the end of it all, we had to pay the extra fare (which we are going to try to get our money back for). Then all through the security line she was screaming. Up until we got into the terminal and she saw the planes. Then, she was fine. But let me tell you….wow, it was horrible there for a good 20 minutes.

To top everything off, Bea threw up while we were there, both nights. Olivia came down with a fever on Saturday night. So you know going home with them wasn’t going to be fun. I have to give a shout out to my Aunt, who continuously washed pukey bedding and clothes for us all the while saying she understood and it was fine, no big deal. Thank you! And thanks for letting us stay with you.

And on a much happier note, our whirlwind trip was a lot of fun and seeing everyone was so nice. We had a really good time visiting with people we don’t see all the time and it was especially nice because my parents were there. The girls got to put up their ornaments “Days of our Lives” style, and Olivia got to light her first candle on the menorah (Bea lit her second).

Oh, and nope, our holiday cards haven’t been started, so if you normally get one from us, plan on it being late this year…

The Overwhelming Holidays

Does anyone else feel that they are just NOT ready for the holidays this year?

I wanted everything to be perfect this year because Bea is more aware of everything, and yet, I just cannot seem to catch up. We finally got our tree this week and decorated it, and have done some holiday shopping, but that's about it. We haven't put up our holiday lights and we have not even begun our holiday cards. At this point, I'm ready to just throw my hands up in the air and say screw it. I feel just too overwhelmed about the cards, being that I still need to take a picture of the girls for it, write the letter, sign the cards and address the envelopes. And in the midst of all of this, I'm still figuring out Bea's birthday shindig, come the second week in January and fastly approaching....

I guess I shouldn't complain too much. We are headed down to L.A. today to visit a number of relatives on both sides of my family. It's truly an honor that Bea and Olivia will get to hang out with their Great Grandfather, so we are looking forward to that and spending time with family. But, we sure aren't looking forward to flying with two little girls on our laps. I apologize in advance to those who may be sitting next to us or near us. Shoot, I apologize to the whole damn plane as I know that Bea will probably be running up and down the aisles the entire time. I'm also paranoid that being in that confined space is going to get us all sick with that recycled air and all, just in time for Christmas. I guess we will see...but I am looking forward to this weekend and seeing everything in spite of all my gibberish ranting.

Maybe I also shouldn't be complaining because I will be off of work from next Wednesday until January 2nd and sure, I've got tons of time to get all that stuff done, right? I'm not one for being late on ANYTHING, so having our holiday cards arrive to people after Christmas makes my skin crawl. At least they will get there, right? But people, if you also only knew the huge project I have undertaken that is a present for Bea's birthday (that Josh doesn't even know about), and the few hours I have already put into it and probably need about 20 more to complete it, I just don't know how I am going to fit it all in. There's hope. And tomorrow is another day...

Oh, and happy holidays.

A Brief Note About the Chinese Gender Calendar

I'm curious to find out how accurate this was for some people. It was right both times for us. But, when looking more closely at the age I was with both pregnancies, according to this chart we didn't have a chance in hell to have a boy. I wonder how accurate this thing is...

Beatrice at 23 Months

Dear Beatrice,

Today you are 23 months old. In the last month, you have made my heart melt but you have also made it break, which is not meant to be a bad thing, but it's really only you challenging me - which you have every right to do as I learn how to handle it all.

You've begun a new journey on your closeness to hitting the two-year mark. Some things are hard for me...and keeping my patience with you has definitely not been easy. The tantrums have started - over nothing really. The hitting has started. "No" has become a prominent part of your vocabulary.


These days you are into everything, wanting everything, and expressing yourself in so many ways. Some of the new phrases that continue to blow my mind are you saying: What happened?, Love You, Balloon Fly Away - Oh No!, See Ya. You are saying sentences now, but some of the words I still can't make out, and it doesn't matter because I know we will understand you soon. Sometimes you are such a chatterbox that I look at your father and start laughing. You've also become fascinated with the holidays, and know the prominent figures of Santa, reindeer, snowman, and Christmas tree.


This month we were asked to watch one of your friends from daycare for the evening. So, your BFF, Catie, came over one night and you were so excited and happy to see her in our home. We gave her one of your sippy cups and you had one as well, and you went up to her and started screaming "Catie! Agua! Catie!" Then you appeared to clink your cup with hers as if you were doing a "cheers". Then you took her to your room, showed her all your toys, and watched cartoons. The two of you took apart my holiday countdown ornament chest and there were figurines everywhere (some of which I still haven't found). Your father blew bubbles and the two of you were catching them and laughing constantly. You were so happy, but when she left, you said bye to her and then you started crying. We told you that you would see her the next day, and that cheered you up somewhat. It's so exciting to see you with others your own age and to know you already have friends.


You've always been a daddy's girl, and there's been absolutely no question about that this last month. You've not wanted much to do with me, and in all honesty, it has really hurt, but I know that you don't know or realize this, so there is no way I can blame you or ever would blame you. However, when I headed for the hospital twice over the last month for a kidney stone, the second time you told me you loved me and then cried for 15 minutes after I left, all the while I was gone you kept asking your father when I would be home or if I was home. I know I mean a lot to you, but sometimes it's hard for me to constantly hear you asking for your father when I want to feel equally as important. Your father is a very important part of your life, and it makes me so happy that he is so involved with making you happy and being there for you. He's a good father to you, and I couldn't ask for anything more...but I do try hard to be a good mother to you as well.


I know my letter to you this month is not as long as usual, but it has flown by so fast and you've still grown so much before my eyes. I've been working a lot, and haven't been at my best healthwise, and therefore have not spent as much time with you as I have wanted. Being with you and watching you in action is entertaining, because I'm watching something that is a part of me learn things (count to ten in English and Spanish) and do things (dancing in circles and singing) that I have once done myself, but at a much older age. Your father claims you are starting to look more like me, but you still have his personality and no fear attitude. I have to agree most of the time, but no matter what you look like or how you act, I will always love you unconditionally.

I love you,

Mama

Love Thursday

Only love today...no words...

A Mom's Will

Have you been following the story about CNET's James Kim and his family missing in Oregon? My heart broke this afternoon when I read this news. While it is fortunate that the mother and children are okay, I can't imagine what they must be going through at this moment. Two daughters, ages 7 months and four years old, will not see their father again. It breaks my heart.

I had been meaning to write a post about this ever since I heard that they found her and the children alive. I wanted to say something about how a woman by herself with her children in that situation will find will within herself to keep her children alive by doing everything she can and making everything seem okay just for the sake of them. After reading what I read, I believe she had - they burned their tires for warmth and she nursed both those kids so they had food. Strong woman, that one. My heart goes out to that family...

Making Us Smile

Day after day, these silly faces make everything seem right with the world.

Things to be Thankful For

My posts have been pretty much nilch lately...Things have been busy and I have not been well. Adding on that, I was back in the hospital yesterday. It appears that my friendly kidney stone either decided not to leave my body and got hung up somewhere or that I had another one come about. So, after seeing my doctor he told me I better head to the ER to have them check me out since they had the equipment to do it on the spot. I wasn't able to get a definite answer due to them not wanting to do another CT scan, but instead an ultrasound. They were worried about me having so much radiation done to my body in such little time, and since there is still a possiblity that I could have more kids**, they wanted to be cautious.

I left the hospital with no complete answers because nothing came up on the ultrasound. The diagnosis was that to treat it like it was a kidney stone and if I feel worse to come back or see my doctor. I guess we will see how it goes. They gave me a very uncomfortable shot in my thigh to help the pain, so now I know how the girls feel when they get their shots in that area.

Yesterday wasn't fun for me between seeing my doctor and going to two different hospitals, one in which I yelled at the triage nurse because my doctor supposedly called them to tell them I was coming for a scan, but apparantly there was no record of it and that hospital didn't do scans on the weekend? I was upset, tired and irratable because the pain woke me up in the middle of the night...one where the girls were sleeping well.

Anyway, things got taken care of...On my way out to hospital #2, I said bye to the girls about 10 times. I didn't want to leave them. I got a lot of kisses from Bea and she said "love you" when I left, but then when she saw me driving away in the car she immediately started crying. Josh said she didn't stop for 15 minutes. I missed my family.

I really just wanted to be home with them but I knew medically, I needed to care of things and feel better. I couldn't wait to come home. When I did, I had two happy girls waiting for me. One that greeted me by running up to me and hugging me, book in hand as it was close to bedtime, and asked to read her a book. The other was hanging out in our bed and kicked her legs and started laughing on my arrival. Both had big smiles and it appeared that both missed me. Josh said that Bea kept saying "Mama home?" over and over the whole day/night. It was really the first time I had been away for that long on a weekend.

In any case, I also came home to an unbelievable clean and spotless house. It was beautiful. Then, after the girls had gone off to bed, Josh drew a bath for me complete with bubbles and candle and a laptop strategically placed that was playing "Sex in the City"...an unbelievable sight for me to see. Those days felt like so long ago. But, it was perfect. And just what I needed. And I was so in awe of my husband and him doing that for me.

And I was so glad to be in our home and with my family...so thankful that I have them. I can't imagine living life without them.

**I have decided that IF we have another child, I am doing it WITHOUT the epidural. The pain I have endured over the last month was WORSE than childbirth. Those talks are still in discussion....

Thanksgiving Weekend Highlights

So, the USB cable for my camera is shot and I have ordered a new one. Until then, no new pics. And I really have some great one's of Olivia and Bea on Thanksgiving.

Highlights of the weekend included:

Olivia got her FIRST tooth - that puppy is razor-edged.

Bea enjoyed playing with her nieces while they were here for a visit.

I got my own gibble-free stuffing, courtesy of Josh's mom.

Josh made pies with the nieces and kept everyone moving.

The food, of course, was scrumptious.

Neither of the girls feasted like I would have liked, but they both did have a few bites.

So...until I get my new cable (it has just been shipped!), here are a couple pics of Bea from last T-giving. My how that girl has grown.

Olivia at 9 Months

Dear Olivia,

Today you are nine months old. And I cannot believe it. This past month has been somewhat challenging, but it has been more than a joy.


You have started babbling quite a lot, and have stopped the cooing that I love so much to hear. When I used to give you kisses on your neck or your face, you used to coo in delight, with a simple “ah” as if you were telling me you love the attention. Instead, you now smile and will instead grab my hair for all its worth. When I try to pull my head away from yours, I often feel a hard yank on my hair and scalp, so sometimes I will hold your hands while I kiss you so that my hair will not be pulled. Continuing on with the babbling, your big thing right now is to go “Da da da da da da da”…over and over again. It’s so incredibly cute. And, sometimes when I want you to do it, I just say it to you and then you repeat it. You are amazing, little girl.


We pulled out the jumper because you are such an incredible kicker, and we thought you would love to bounce. You aren’t too sure what to do with yourself while you’re in it – as the first time proved this. You just stood up straight-legged, and would not for the life of you bend those legs. The other night you were in your excersaucer, and you were jumping up and down, so I pulled out the jumper again. First, you just sat there like the last time. Then you bent your legs and turned yourself in another direction. Then you stood up straight and appeared to attempt to take a few walking steps. I kept clapping my hands and yelling “jump, Olivia, jump” which drew your sister over to us to see what the fuss was all about. She knew how that thing worked, so she grabbed the side of it and started yelling “jump jump jump” at you while making it go up and down. So, then what happened? You started jumping. It wasn’t anything really to write home about, but there were quite a few times when you would bounce 3 to 4 times and then suddenly stop yourself.

Your father has said that you are drawn to me. I know this is probably true because I spend a lot of time with you and I am always so happy to be with you. Whenever I am not in the room you turn and look for me, and if I am in the room, you don’t stop staring at me and trying to get my attention. I like to spend a lot of time with you because I know that you are soon going to be off doing your own thing and I am trying to enjoy my Olivia that is still so babylike as long as I can.


Yes, you are growing, and you are doing new things. Though I do want you to stay like a baby, we are trying hard to get you to crawl. We have made a lot of attempts over the last month to get you moving. None of these have been successful so far. First, your father decided that we should probably give you more tummy time. You are okay for a few minutes, but then you start crying and are easily distracted and not sure what to do with yourself. You are crying for someone to pick you up because you are out of your realm. One night I read something online to put you on your tummy and place a towel under your arms and lift you up so you appear to be crawling. While that was pretty cool to see (because you appeared to be crawling), you had had it with me and that towel, and you ended up throwing up because you got so upset. So yesterday I read another story that sounded like it would be good to try. Since you sit up now and play without issues, you sometimes will lung out for toys in front of you that you can’t reach. I usually move them to you. No more. The lung part of the whole thing is supposed to get you to the crawling position. Last night we did that, and it proved to be successful, as you lunged out for toys and I did not help you. You looked like you were going to get there soon…However, after one of your many lunges, you pushed back to your sitting position and it was a little too hard. You fell backwards and hit your head. Then you started crying and wouldn’t stop and gave me the evil eye after your father decided to comfort you.


We have also started giving you finger foods and people food. Your favorite so far has been banana bread and oranges, but you also adore the cherry puffs. I love to hear you eat. You are so cute with no teeth, munching just like a person who has them…those gums just smack together and make such a cute sound. I guess you could say that you are a loud eater, but you definitely are enjoying the food we give you. As for your sleeping, you are somewhat intermittent as to how well you do at night. Some nights you will sleep ten hours straight. Some nights you will wake up once or twice. The nights that you sleep better are the one’s where you’ve gotten two naps that day. The night’s that are not good are when you take only one nap. I think you need your two naps, baby girl.


You’ve definitely shown us that you like being a part of our family, and we are so happy that you are a part of it. Your sister, if she could say the actual words, would tell you how much she enjoys catering to you and bringing and sharing her toys with you, and that she cannot wait until you are walking and talking so that you two can play together. Little Livey, you brighten our every day and we are enjoying watching you grow. Your sunny disposition has a way of always making things better, and happier. I love each moment I spend with you.

Love,
Mama

The Mullet

Help me, please!

Josh kept telling me she had a mullet. I kept ignoring him. Turns out, as I look at some of these recent pictures, she indeed has a mullet. I am not a fan of the mullet. She looks fine when her hair is up in ponytails, just not when it is down. The girl has some pretty funky cowlicks, so it is hard to cut the hair in any suitable manner. We have ONLY cut her bangs. How in the world did this happen, and how in the name of all things unhick-like, do we get rid of the mullet before Thanksgiving dinner?

For the Love of Pudding

Take one happy toddler:



With a bowl of pudding made from this stuff:



And you get this:






The pudding: was mooshed to death
The cleanup: not pretty
The Beatrice: had about 15 minutes of fun with that pudding before being thrown in the tub that produced a brown cloud in the sparkling clean water

A toddler with pudding: Completely priceless

Beatrice

Dear Beatrice,

I ultimately have a fear that you are going to hate your name as you get older. Yes, your name is old-fashioned, but it has a lot of meaning – and I do have to tell you that I love it because it is quite unique for this day and age.

Your first name, Beatrice, was decided on the day we found out you were a girl. Your great-grandmother’s name (on your father’s side) was Beatrice. There are a lot of stories about her that have been told to me – how strong of a woman she was – but, she was also quite creative and there are many paintings she did that are still around in the family. When you get older, you will have to have your father and grandfather tell you stories about her. Your father and I love the name we chose for you. It’s quite a possibility you might get teased because you get a “cool” phrase when shortening your first name to “Bea” and then adding our last name. But, you know what? I can’t even say how much your name suits you.

As for your middle name, that is a completely different story. We couldn’t come up with anything and struggled and struggled with it. At my baby shower, we had everyone fill out a slip of paper to give three different options for your middle name. I thought it was a nice idea, but I had no time to sit down and go through them thoroughly since you came two days later. So, while in labor and having contractions, your father read all of them to me when you were just hours away of coming into the world. He had to read through them twice, and then we had a couple that we liked. Samantha was our favorite, and so that is what became your middle name.

So, if you really end up not liking your first name, we are happy to give you a second option, something that you can shorten to “Sam” if you preferred. But, I do hope you like it, my Bea.

Beatrice: happy, bringer of joy

Believe it or not, your name suits you perfectly. You are pretty much always happy (even when you are sick) and you bring your father, sister and I so much joy.

I love you,
Mama

Olivia

Dear Olivia,

It’s funny because I had been thinking about writing this for a while now, and the topic came up last night between your father and I about your name. We love the name Olivia, so why did we choose it for you?

Your father had phoned one of his friends who has a daughter the same age as your sister. Their daughter was having a birthday party, and your father thought that her name was Olivia. He asked his friend about his daughter’s name – “Her name is Olivia, right?” and his friend said, “No, her name is R.” So, when he got off the phone, we both looked at each other and said, “That’s it!”

But, let me backtrack a little bit. I wanted to give you a name that was so very unique and one that wasn’t on the popular names list for the last five years. We were drawn to the names Hailey and Bailey and Madison. Unfortunately, all were very popular. I even liked Emma and Isabella. Those were popular, too. One day I was thinking about names and “April” came to mind. Your father really liked it, and I did, too. It wasn’t on any of the popular lists, so I had thought that was going to be your name for sure. And I loved it. It reminds me of that time of year when it is still a little cold and rainy but everything is starting to bloom and turn into spring...a very pretty time of the year.

Then, Olivia came along. Your chosen name became Olivia April. The name Olivia has become somewhat popular, but it is rare that we call you that. You have many nicknames, one of which I hope will stick and one that you can use if you don’t like your full name. Those being:

Olive (your father’s favorite)
Livey (my favorite)
Liv
O

You could always go by your middle name if you like that better.

It’s funny how parents choose the names of their unborn before they are actually around. Who knows if the name will suit the child, right? That’s a fear I had with you...what if the name just doesn’t fit and you don’t look like an Olivia? We’d have to start all over. But, the second I saw you, I knew that it was a fit. You’re an Olivia, a little olive, my little livey. You don’t fit any of the other names I mentioned above.

Olivia: Symbol of Peace, Olive Tree

I love you,
Mama

What do you get when...

You have a temper tantruming toddler?

Plus an 8 1/2 month old about to cut her first tooth?

Add a mom on PMS.

And a dad just trying to deal with a home full of females?

Well, it's just a minor road block that will pass in a few days...and all will be well with the world once again.

Beatrice at 22 Months

Dear Beatrice,

Today you are 22 months old. You've changed a lot in the last month, with quite a few interesting developments. There's a lot I want to tell you about the little girl that you are becoming, so I'll start where last month left off.

This year we went to the pumpkin patch to get ready for Halloween. You had a great time, and you took your first train ride. You were so excited to be on that train. Also, we picked out pumpkins and your father and you were off all over the pumpkin patch. You wouldn't leave his side, and shortly after that you said the word "pumpkin".


For Halloween, I got you a pretty fairy costume, complete with wand, tights and new shoes. You rarely wear a dress, and you have never in your life worn tights or fancy little black patent shoes. The morning of Halloween I got you ready in your costume because there was going to be a party at your daycare. You screamed at me and kept saying "No" over and over again. "What is this girlie outfit?" you appeared to ask. You seemed to hate it. I took your picture anyway. When I dropped you off at daycare, I feared that the costume wouldn't make it but a half hour. When I got home that evening, you were still in it. I asked your father if he put you in it and he told me that you wouldn't let anyone take that costume off you all day. Sometimes I just don't understand. It's almost like you know it will make me happy so you rebel, but then when I am not around you do things like it's no big deal.

So, on Halloween we decided to take you trick-or-treating. We put your sister in her costume, too, and went around to a few houses. Our neighbors were going out later and said we could join them. Your father stayed home with your sister because we had a lot of people coming to the door, and you and I went out together with the neighbors. You were not happy, but I think it was because you were disoriented with being outdoors when it was dark. We had a wagon with us, and you sat in it most of the time and wouldn't come out to go up to the doors. Everytime I tried, you started crying or you just wanted to be held. Oh well, maybe we will have better luck next year. I still think you had a good time, though.


This month has also brought on quite the vocabulary. My favorite words include: help, pumpkin, choo choo, Beatrice. Yes, you said your own name. You also started saying "owie", as in having a cut or scar or something else that is not normal looking on someone's body. This month when I got a blister on my foot, you saw it and kept saying "mama owie" over and over again, until you came right up to it and poked it. Then you would continue to do that to me every day. It was funny, but it did hurt, and that's ok. You pick up on words and phrases very quickly now, so your father and I have started watching what we say around you. One night I yelled "Oh my gosh!" and then right after you repeated it. So I said it again and you repeated it again. Three times this happened. When you noticed that your father and I thought it was cute, you immediately clammed up and refused to do it anymore. A week has gone by now, and everytime we say it, you yell "No!"


You've also become quite the singer this month. Even if you don't know all the words to a song, you get the ones you know in there at the right time and say them in tune with the song. I actually remembered more nursery rhyme songs this month and found out that you already knew them and learned them at daycare. So, on the way there in the morning, we sing songs the whole way. Your favorite at the moment is "Twinkle, Twinkle". You know what a lot of words in the song are, too, which makes it special to you, I think. One night when I was putting you to bed, you started singing to me. At that moment, I wanted to pull you out of bed and have you stay up just a little longer. Instead, I smiled at you, told you I loved you and that you did a good job singing. Additionally, you can do the Olivia rap without flaw. You rock, Punks!


Your enthusiam for things has grown tremendously this month. When you used to see an object you knew the name to, you would often just point it out: a plane, a tree, a flower, Elmo, Moo Moo, etc. You would say the name of it and point. This month you have wanted me or someone else to share that experience with you. So, for example, when you see a plane you scream, "Plane! Mama Plane! Plane!" You do this with just about everything. You're so excited and you want everyone around you to be excited, too, and to tell you truth, it is hard not to be excited about those things which are so often taken for granted. It's one of those stop and smell the roses types of things. Thank you for making me slow down this month.


This month has been a rocky one for your mama. I have been sick with different things for almost the entire month. My energy has been less than it usually is and I have had some moments of depression. I hope that you weren't able to see a lot of that because I really tried hard not to let you. I want your world to be perfect, and if not perfect, then pretty darn near close to it. Though you've been quite a daddy's girl, there are times when I know I mean a lot to you. When you get up at night and your father puts you in our bed briefly while he gets some milk for you, you whisper to me. "Mama," you say. And then you make your way over to me in the bed and hug some part of my body. You then make your way back to where you were before your father returns. How much do I love you? So incredibly much...

Love,
Mama

P.S. - I can't forget to mention that I taught you the "MMMWAHHHH" that goes along with a kiss this month. You do it with everyone when you give them a kiss. But you and me have a secret "MWAH". We can do the "MMMMMM" part of it for a long time and then make the "WAH" sound at the end at the very same time. It's our thing, something I am glad we have together.

A Believer No More

When I blew out my birthday candles in the year 2000, I wished that I would become engaged to the man of my dreams. I did.

In 2002 and 2003, I wished to become pregnant, and I made sure I blew them out with a single blow. It took two years for that wish to come true, but it did.

As for every other year of my life, the wishes have been somewhat materialistic. Except for this year. This year I wished for something for myself AND my family. I can already tell you that my wish has not come true and is well beyond coming true, at least for me.

Without saying exactly what I wished for (because maybe there is a glimmer of hope and I don't want to break the "don't ever tell your wish" rule), I will tell you that it doesn't even have a chance right now of breaking even. Why? Because the worst cold ever flew through our house knocking everyone on their butts right after my birthday. Since then, I have had a kidney stone. And now? Well, let's just say I have the worst sore throat that could be one of two things - Strep or some new irrating cold. But, maybe it is just a side effect of going off of those nice pain pills. It hasn't even been a MONTH since my birthday!

My wish that I put a lot of thought into? Out the window, folks.

Next year, I could be wishing to win the lottery instead. Because with that, my friends, I at least have a one in forty-two million shot at.

Everyone else here is healthy right now, except me. And it's fine...really, it is.

How I Have Felt Lately

I figured I should post the great pumpkin carving Josh did before it becomes 2007. It also depicts the way I have felt lately to a "T". An update to come soon.

Kidney Stone? Yes, Kidney Stone.

Or??? Kidney Stone.

Did anyone watch Friends, or still watches the re-runs? I keep thinking about the episode where Joey has a kidney stone. It’s so similar, people.

This post is about me.

Last night I woke up to excruciating pain on my right lower back and also in the front. I instantly thought it could be two things:

I somehow threw out my back.
Josh kneed me violently in his sleep, yet I think I would have woke up to that.

I could barely move. Advil didn’t help. At 3 am, I told him I was going to the emergency room.

So, after blood work, a urine test, an ultrasound and a CAT scan, I learned two things:

I have kidney stone.
I have an ovarian cyst.

Fun times, right? Well, at first they thought that I had a ruptured ovarian cyst that was causing the pain, but supposedly it is a normal one that will go away on its own. The CAT scan proved what it was...and as I lay there in pain, I was thinking that was what it might be. Anyone who knows me knows that I don’t do well during emergency room visits, as I tend to go ape shit on innocent people doing their jobs as they should. Generally I am a good patient, but when I don’t know what is wrong and have to sit for long periods of time, I get very impatient and take that out on other people. I am sorry, hospital workers.

Last night wasn’t any different as I was sitting in some pain that was easily comparable to contractions that were constant. No break here. After I supplied what little pee I could, they did not want to give me any sort of medication until it was confirmed that I was not pregnant. People, please! I have two babies who are very young, do you think I want #3 (if there is to be) right now? No way I am pregnant, people. No way. But they had to be sure and they were doing their job, but seriously, it took over an hour to get those results. I wanted to tell them to just bring me an EPT so we could quickly confirm and I can get some pain relievers. No can do.

I cannot describe the pain. Plus, I do not want to relive it. As I sit here, I am awaiting the passing of my new little frenemy, the kidney stone. And as I wait, I am happily taking some prescribed ibuprofen and vicodin.

Did I mention that I am on jury duty and might have to go in? Hopefully, this would be excusable.

I am very uneasy about this next part of this entry...and I am not sure I am making the right decision to post it or not.

I have been thinking a lot lately about this blog. I love my blog. Judging from the meter and what google analytics tells me, other people like my blog, too. However, some of the other blogger sites that I read daily have recently had their children exploited in some ridiculous ways over the Internet. Sad when it comes down to that. Though I do not have as many readers as these people, I do wonder if what I am doing is a good thing by having this open to anyone.

I started this blog for a few reasons:

--To keep track of my girls and document things because I easily forget things now
--To have stories to share with the girls when they are older
--If something should ever happen to me, I want the girls to be able to have something to hold on to that was for them specifically, and from their mom - to know how much I love them
--To keep family and friends that are located far away informed

Additionally, I have come to really like people who have stumbled across my blog and comment from time to time, like Scribbit and Jenn and Haggalicious. I don’t know these people personally, but I love their blogs and enjoy reading them, and I want them to continue to read mine. Though I would love for everyone who reads this to comment, I know that some people do like to remain anonymous. Every comment I receive makes me smile. At the same time, I have these feelings that I am letting people in to see bits of my life and my family and my fears and accomplishments, while not getting anything in return. I know that might sound selfish and I am sorry for that, but I like to share and hear about other people, too.

At this juncture, I’m not sure what to do. Do I make this private or keep it the way it is? Please bear with me as I pass my stone, because maybe the medication and pain is going to my head, but I felt I needed to get this off my chest.

P.S. – Both girls are doing great. Josh stayed home today to cater to me – picked up my meds and got the girls off to daycare.

Grandma and Grandpa T, Happy Anniversary!!

And Happy Halloween, everyone, from my little pony and pretty fairy.

Weekend Update

Bottles Be-Gone Attempt #1: Failed

We came. We tried. We lost the battle (this time, at least):

About 10am on Saturday, Bea says she wants her bottle.

Josh goes to the kitchen and fills a sippy cup with milk. He comes back and hands it to her.

She takes it and then hurls it across the room. And then she cries.

Five minutes go by. She’s still crying. Josh says, “Do you want to get her a bottle?” I say, “Sure, but I am putting water in it.”

I go to the kitchen and proceed. I hand Bea the water-filled bottle. She stops crying for about 10 seconds to examine the bottle and notices that it is a clear liquid instead of a white liquid. She takes it and hurls it across the room. She goes back to crying.

The crying is temper-tantrum like – laying on the floor on her stomach, hands in her arms, and kicking her legs. She cries for about another five minutes.

I couldn’t take it and because she hasn’t been feeling well, give in.

I go back to the kitchen. She follows me. Still crying, she watches what I am doing. I empty the bottle and fill it with milk. I go to hand it to her and she runs away crying. I try to tell her that it is her “buh-buh” but she won’t have anything to do with me. Then, she finally takes it. She looks at me through her tears, and well, it was very hard to make it out, but she said two words. The second being “you”. The first being either “hate” or “thank”. I believe it was “thank” because she doesn’t know the word hate, at least as far as I know. I wanted to cry right there on the spot.

She doesn’t drink that much of it.

Believe me, I wanted to try again. But that same night, she somehow starting saying “please”. So, when she was in her bed that night, she said “buh-buh” and I just looked at her thinking I was going to get her the cup, and she said, “Mama – pwease?” I was shocked. “Pwease, mama...Pwease. Pwease.”

How could I not give her what she wanted?

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Olivia started clapping this weekend! And she is standing up (with help), but is enjoying her ability to be tall and do something new.

Wool Over Eyes: Pulled

I picked up both girls from daycare yesterday and was chatting with our provider about a few things, just the normal rundown of how they ate, napped, etc. The conversation shortly took an interesting turn into this “new thing” that Bea has started doing.

Provider: So, Bea only had one bottle this morning. Actually, not very much was from the bottle because she has been doing so well lately by drinking the milk from the sippy cup.

Me: (Blank stare and then eyes turn into the size of golf balls, lots of white showing.) Oh?

Provider: Yes. She’s doing so great.

Me: My Beatrice? (Because you see, I secretly thought there was another child there by that same name when I already know ALL eight names of the children getting care there. Was there another Bea I didn’t know about hidden away somewhere?)

Provider: Yes, and it was so funny at lunch today because she finished it and set it down on Z’s tray in her triumph.

Me: (Laughing quietly.) That’s so funny, because at home she knows the difference, will take one sip, and immediately tell Josh or me that it needs to be “agua” instead. How long has this been going on?

Provider: Pretty much all week.

Me: You’re kidding.

Provider: No.

Me: Huh. (Completely baffled)

That kid got the devil look from me yesterday. Why is it that she doesn’t do it at home when we attempt it? It’s because she knows. She’s got us trained. That’s it. This weekend we are trying. And, in case you are wondering, I never did a full blown attempt to get her off of the bottles. But now, it’s on!

Love Thursday, Take 3

I'm at home today, and sick. Bea has the croup (AGAIN!), and Olivia is getting over the cold that the rest of us are going through/have had. I'm the only one home, and with work being so busy and having to constantly put out fires, I am working. I am working on the lonely desktop PC that has gathered so much dust and takes about 20 minutes to boot up. I haven't an ounce of patience, but I am trying.

While waiting for a response from someone at work, I began going through some files on this oldie computer. I couldn't believe what I found. Pictures that I don't even remember. So, in "Love Thursday" style, here are two pictures that nearly brought me to tears this morning. The quality is poor, but at least I have them to enjoy.

Josh and I and our one of about one hundred attempts to take a photo for our annual holiday card. I am pregnant with Bea and about one month out from delivery:



Me resting with Bea and the kitties just about a week or two after her arrival: