Beatrice at 2 Years, 1 Month

Dear Beatrice,

You are now over two years old...two years and one month old, to be precise. You've changed a lot over the last couple of months, and you are beginning to become your own person, with her own opinion, showing interest in new things every single day.


How I have longed for you to become somewhat girly because for most of your life you have been quite neutral on that front. You have an interest in both girl and boy activities, but you prefer jeans and t-shirts to dresses. This last month has seen a change in that aspect, in just a very small way. You've watched me many a time put on lotion after a shower, but you recently noticed the interesting container of my body butter and wondering just what it is and why it feels that way and what you do with it. For the last week and a half, you ask for lotion after your bath, and sometimes before it. Sometimes you would rather skip the bath part and go straight to the lotion. You love the smelly part of it and lathering it over your body. Most often I have to cut you off because you are covered head to toe in it. You used to get mad when I told you that that was enough lotion, but now we say goodbye to the lotion, put it back where it goes, and know that tomorrow night we will use it again. It's fun to have this with you...and having this interest with you.


Additionally, you have taken very close watch on your sister. You feel as if you are her guardian, her mom so to speak. You are always aware of where she is and what she's doing. You also monitor everything she has. If she has something that you think she shouldn't have, you take it away from her. Sometimes you tell her no. I'm not sure if I am seeing the bossy side of my Beatrice, or the Beatrice that cares so much about her sister that she wants to guide her through the world. I have gotten upset at you when you take away things that she can have - they're just toys and ones you have not had an interest in for some time. I tell you to give the toy back to her, and most of the time you do. More than anything, I do like you looking out for her. You've shown me the caring side of yourself, and I hope that you care for her like that for the rest of your life.

The things that are coming out of your mouth these days are incredible. We often can't stop you from talking. Your words are now forming sentences. In the last couple of weeks, you have asked me "What's that, Mama?" a couple of times. You're so curious. You want to know about everything, learn everything and show everybody how much you know. I am sure the "Why?" is soon to follow. Today you said your ABC's all the way through, and you are now counting beyond ten in English and Spanish. You are amazing, little girl, and so incredibly smart. I can't even believe what I am hearing sometimes. And, oh the mimicking...I'll leave it at that.


Getting you to bed has become somewhat easier. On the nights when you don't want to go to bed, you play out a number of different scenarios to try to put it off. It's the missing Bow-wow, the missing Sally, the owie, wanting more buh-buh, where is daddy, where is Olivia. And sometimes you just crash out from exhaustion. And sometimes, oh sometimes, I just want to stay in your room and hang out with you as I will just keep going in to check on you, kiss you goodnight one more time and see if you need anything.

You were sick a lot over the last month - first croup, then a cold and then a case of mild pneumonia. It wasn't easy for any of us, as the whole family was sick with something. Some nights you would throw up from all of the congestion and I would go running into your room with bucket in hand. One night I got lucky and actually caught half of it, and you seemed to know what to do with the bucket. But, oh the amount of laundry that was done endlessly this month. Baby girl, it was worth it, and to make sure your blankie was always clean when you weren't feeling well. When it was obvious that you were not feeling well one night, I felt like rocking you to sleep like when you were a baby. Instead, I laid next to your bed, ran my hand through your hair numerous times, and told you I loved you over and over again. I asked you if you were ok, and in your sweet voice you said, "yeah, am ok mama." I asked if you were sure and you said, "yeah". I asked if you needed anything and you said, "no". Then I said, "if you need anything, anything at all, you come get me, ok?" and you said, "yes, mama". You didn't that night...it was the turning point of feeling better.


I always want you to be okay, well better than okay. I worry about you constantly. I want you to be well. I want you to be happy. I think you're happy for the most part, but I hope we get to feeling well again. You're so much fun to be around these days, and I am loving every moment of it. And I love you so very much...

Love,
Mama