Grandma and Grandpa T, Happy Anniversary!!

And Happy Halloween, everyone, from my little pony and pretty fairy.

Weekend Update

Bottles Be-Gone Attempt #1: Failed

We came. We tried. We lost the battle (this time, at least):

About 10am on Saturday, Bea says she wants her bottle.

Josh goes to the kitchen and fills a sippy cup with milk. He comes back and hands it to her.

She takes it and then hurls it across the room. And then she cries.

Five minutes go by. She’s still crying. Josh says, “Do you want to get her a bottle?” I say, “Sure, but I am putting water in it.”

I go to the kitchen and proceed. I hand Bea the water-filled bottle. She stops crying for about 10 seconds to examine the bottle and notices that it is a clear liquid instead of a white liquid. She takes it and hurls it across the room. She goes back to crying.

The crying is temper-tantrum like – laying on the floor on her stomach, hands in her arms, and kicking her legs. She cries for about another five minutes.

I couldn’t take it and because she hasn’t been feeling well, give in.

I go back to the kitchen. She follows me. Still crying, she watches what I am doing. I empty the bottle and fill it with milk. I go to hand it to her and she runs away crying. I try to tell her that it is her “buh-buh” but she won’t have anything to do with me. Then, she finally takes it. She looks at me through her tears, and well, it was very hard to make it out, but she said two words. The second being “you”. The first being either “hate” or “thank”. I believe it was “thank” because she doesn’t know the word hate, at least as far as I know. I wanted to cry right there on the spot.

She doesn’t drink that much of it.

Believe me, I wanted to try again. But that same night, she somehow starting saying “please”. So, when she was in her bed that night, she said “buh-buh” and I just looked at her thinking I was going to get her the cup, and she said, “Mama – pwease?” I was shocked. “Pwease, mama...Pwease. Pwease.”

How could I not give her what she wanted?

***************************************************

Olivia started clapping this weekend! And she is standing up (with help), but is enjoying her ability to be tall and do something new.

Wool Over Eyes: Pulled

I picked up both girls from daycare yesterday and was chatting with our provider about a few things, just the normal rundown of how they ate, napped, etc. The conversation shortly took an interesting turn into this “new thing” that Bea has started doing.

Provider: So, Bea only had one bottle this morning. Actually, not very much was from the bottle because she has been doing so well lately by drinking the milk from the sippy cup.

Me: (Blank stare and then eyes turn into the size of golf balls, lots of white showing.) Oh?

Provider: Yes. She’s doing so great.

Me: My Beatrice? (Because you see, I secretly thought there was another child there by that same name when I already know ALL eight names of the children getting care there. Was there another Bea I didn’t know about hidden away somewhere?)

Provider: Yes, and it was so funny at lunch today because she finished it and set it down on Z’s tray in her triumph.

Me: (Laughing quietly.) That’s so funny, because at home she knows the difference, will take one sip, and immediately tell Josh or me that it needs to be “agua” instead. How long has this been going on?

Provider: Pretty much all week.

Me: You’re kidding.

Provider: No.

Me: Huh. (Completely baffled)

That kid got the devil look from me yesterday. Why is it that she doesn’t do it at home when we attempt it? It’s because she knows. She’s got us trained. That’s it. This weekend we are trying. And, in case you are wondering, I never did a full blown attempt to get her off of the bottles. But now, it’s on!

Love Thursday, Take 3

I'm at home today, and sick. Bea has the croup (AGAIN!), and Olivia is getting over the cold that the rest of us are going through/have had. I'm the only one home, and with work being so busy and having to constantly put out fires, I am working. I am working on the lonely desktop PC that has gathered so much dust and takes about 20 minutes to boot up. I haven't an ounce of patience, but I am trying.

While waiting for a response from someone at work, I began going through some files on this oldie computer. I couldn't believe what I found. Pictures that I don't even remember. So, in "Love Thursday" style, here are two pictures that nearly brought me to tears this morning. The quality is poor, but at least I have them to enjoy.

Josh and I and our one of about one hundred attempts to take a photo for our annual holiday card. I am pregnant with Bea and about one month out from delivery:



Me resting with Bea and the kitties just about a week or two after her arrival:

"Mama Help"

Over the last week, Bea has developed a new phrase: Mama Help.

While the "Mama" sounds normal, the "Help" sounds a little bit off and not the way the word sounds coming from an adult. The way she pronunciates it, makes it sound like "Heeeelllllp." It's pretty long and drawn out and said in the little girl voice that she now has.

The phrase is used for one reason only:

To get herself OUT of trouble.

Being now that she is a climber, she will get herself into certain situations that she doesn't know how to get out of:

By climbing onto our castle of a bed and trying to get down.
By climbing onto the dining room chairs and trying to get down.
By climbing up onto our front porch stair handles and trying to get down.
By climbing up onto our side table to see the fish and then trying to get down.

Each and every time it is not just "Help", but "Mama Help" and is used to get out of a situation like this. And I like this because normally she would throw a tantrum and get upset about not being able to get down because of her lack of ability to communicate like that just yet. But, now, I don't know where she picked it up, but I love how she can just let me know she needs help. It makes things easier.

I only hope that it won't soon be "Mama Help", as she throws her stuffies in the toilet and attempts to flush them and then wants me to save them so they don't drown.

Be Very, Very Quiet

I took the girls out for a walk on Saturday due to them both being more than ready for a nap. I didn't realize they would both conk out, and at the same time and one block before being home. It was suddenly quiet in the stroller and there was no movement. When I pulled up into our driveway and stopped, this is what I saw:



Same position, same look on the face...everything.

In fact, I thought this photo was so cute that I went and entered into a contest on Flickr called "Sleeping Like A Baby". I'm sure we don't have a chance at all being that there are over 100 photos, but I guess we'll see. There are real prizes, so it would be nice to get a little something that I could spend or use on the girls.

Olivia at Eight Months

Dear Olivia,

Today you are eight months old. That's 2/3 a year already, and can we just let time stand still for the last 1/3 (don't let February come too quickly)?

You have become an incredible little creature over the last month. You've been able to sit up on your own now without toppling over. When you are laying at an angle on your back, you now have enough strength to pull yourself up to sitting position. The strength that you have amazes both your father and I. Often when we are sitting with you, you will kick those legs with so much strength that I think you might crack one of my ribs.


I can tell that you are ready to start crawling when I put you on the ground and you roll all over the place. You are now scooting a little on your back by using your legs to push you around. You get so much joy out of it, too, so it's really fun to watch you.


You are so wide-eyed all the time, and your eyes are so expressive, much like your fathers. You've begun to babble quite a bit, too, letting us know that you have your own opinion on things. However, this last month you haven't wanted to be left alone. When someone leaves the room or just walks away from you briefly, you clearly state that that is not what you want. You want everyone in your presence.


You have also become a grabber. You want to play with everything in sight, including your sisters hair when she gives you hugs and kisses. This has resulted in the first fight among the two of you. Other interesting things this month include your most always happy demeanor, which I hope you never grow out of, and your instance on waking up in the middle of the night and wanting to play.


Little Livy, (my new nickname for you) you are clearly moving on from babyhood. I don't want you to. Once you start crawling, I am going to miss your little baby self that I have become accustomed to. You are quite the snuggler, and I am enjoying my time with you so much. As each day passes, you are a little bigger, a little stronger, and bring me more joy than the day before. Most of all and above everything else, when I really want to cry, you have the ability to make me smile and make me feel better. You make me stronger.

I love you,
Mama

What a Card Can Do

I received a card in the mail from my parents that had the following passage:

A daughter is a precious gift

When a daughter is born, she fills your life with so much happiness—
It starts when you first hold her close with pride and tenderness.
And as she grows, your loving feelings grow and deepen, too—
You take such joy in what she says and all she learns to do.
Then through the years, the special times and sharing play a part
In all the happy memories you treasure in your heart.
Thoughts of you bring pleasant memories of you as a little girl
And feelings of pride in the woman you’ve become.
Your birthday is another reminder of what a wonderful daughter you are
How much you’ve always meant, how much you always will.

It means more to me now than it would have a few years ago when I didn't have children of my own. It meant a lot.

Another Love Thursday

A love between a daughter and her father can be really amazing.

I can definitely tell that Bea loves each of us the same, but in different ways. Last night it was all about being with daddy. She awoke a few times last night, and one time, she was sitting in front of her dresser saying "Daddy" over and over again. I think it might have been about thirty times or so. Sometimes said sadly, sometimes said normally. When I went to go in and get her, she kept saying it to me. I know she wanted him, but he wasn't feeling well and had already gotten her once. I did get her back to sleep, but I know she wanted him and wished that I could have just been him for those few minutes.

And again, this morning she kept asking about him, from the time she got up to the time we left the house. The roles we play as parents are sacred...we are the ones depended on by those who are not yet independent themselves. They look up to us in their own way. It's not that she wanted anything from him, just that she wanted to be with him. And for the last 12 hours, Bea has shown her father just how much she loves him.

Separation Anxiety

Building on my last post about the weekend, I was thinking about something yesterday. This last weekend was the first time in a few weeks where we had the girls for the entire weekend. I didn't have a moment away from them. When I ran an errand, I brought one with me. I am enjoying my time so much more with them these days and it was nice to always have one or both of them around.

So, yesterday, when I dropped the girls off at daycare, I felt very sad. I wanted to stay home with them. I stayed at daycare for a few minutes saying goodbye. When I left, I was sad. I started wondering if I could provide better care for them at home. Could I stay home? Do I want to stay home? I enjoy having my own career, outside of my mom world...something that is mine and mine alone, even though it can bring frustration and stress at times. I wish there was some way that I could work 2 to 3 days a week and then stay home with them the rest of the time.

With time going by so fast, I feel like I am missing so much sometimes. Some mornings I look at Bea and I wonder when it was that she got so big. Same with Olivia. She was just born, wasn't she? How can seven months go by that fast? Each day brings something new with both of them, so I get sad thinking about these "firsts" actually happening when I’m not around. I guess that having them around constantly during the weekend, even though for only two days, felt like a big change come Monday morning when I am separated from them for nine hours.

I carried those girls in me for nine months. I spent time at home with them as newborns. I went back to work, and sure I missed them, but not like this.

Why is it that I now have separation anxiety so badly that I want to leave work and go pick them up right this instant?

My Idea of a Perfect Weekend

For the first time in a long time, we didn’t have anything planned for the weekend. And it was actually quite perfect.

Friday night after work, we had a somewhat cranky Olivia on our hands but I was in the mood big time for some Pho soup, and we have a great place that we go to. So, we ended up taking the girls there with us, and it was pretty late, so we thought Olivia would fall asleep on the way there and Bea on the way home. Neither happened. But they were off to bed shortly after we got home.

On Saturday morning when we all woke up, it was nice to not be in a rush. We just kind of layed around in the morning and did nothing. The girls somewhat slept in, but we were all up by 7 (late for us these days)…

Anyway, we made some new friends, and we were invited over to their home in the afternoon for some beer can chicken and fresh-fried abalone. They also have a daughter that is 11 days younger than Bea, so it was fun to watch the two of them together, so similar in size and in their actions. They really kept each other busy running around and playing. And, oh how they ate their apple pie (that Josh made) with vanilla ice cream in their booster chairs at the table together, it was definitely a cute sight. Bea learned her new friends name and said it every chance she got, even the next day.

Sunday morning was lazy as well. We had planned to go to the big Half Moon Bay Pumpkin Festival. The weather wasn’t too nice, and we figured it was going to be cold, foggy and drizzly there, so we opted for a pumpkin patch closer to home that we had been to before in Morgan Hill. There was a train, tractor ride, hayride and tons of pumpkins. The girls went on their first train ride with us and they had a great time…it makes me look forward to the Disneyland trip in a few years because they had such excitement on their faces. We picked out three pumpkins and then headed home. Here’s some pics from yesterday:





And quite possibly my favorite of them all:

Up to our Ears in Bottles

I want to get Bea off of bottles. Badly.

I've tried once, but it seems like an impossible feat due to Olivia having bottles as well. One sight of the bottle and that is all I will hear about from her.

So, I've come up with a plan which I have thought about for over a week now. I'm not sure I like it, hence my hesitation for writing about it or trying it out. The plan and background is this:

We use Dr. Brown's bottles that come in nipple sizes of 1, 2 and 3. Number 1 is for the newborn, slow eaters who need to figure out that sucking furiously will get them something to eat and not overwhelm them with the amount of flow. Number 2 is the middle, where Olivia is at now. Number 3 is where Bea is – the aggressive eater nipple, where if you turn the bottle upside down, it will just kind of pour out.

What if I switched Bea back to a number 1 nipple? But then I offer her a sippy cup with milk, too? Give her the bottle first, which she will most likely refuse, then offer her the cup. If everything plays out like it should, she should realize that the cup offers her more milk upfront and she doesn't have to work for it. She would refuse the bottle and take the cup because those darn bottles should be worthless, right?

She takes everything else from the sippy, but not milk.

I don't think it will work like that at all because I've definitely got a stubborn one that I am working with. It's a weekend project, I'm sure, and one that will be filled with tears and frustration from all parties involved. Do I really want to spend the weekend doing this? No.

In any case, I'm open to other ideas, but one thing to remember is that we will still have bottles openly present because of Olivia, which makes things a little more difficult.

Beatrice at 21 Months

Dear Beatrice,

Today you are 21 months old, and it’s been quite an interesting month for us all. You are an amazing little creature, Bea.

Some things have stayed the same, and other things have changed tremendously this month. You finally conquered “Dada” at 20 months, only to have it change right into “Daddy” this last month, something I know your father really enjoys. Half the time you now call me “Mama” and the other half is “Mommy”. And “Olivia” is finally coming together for you. A four-syllable word or name can be pretty difficult, but you’ve come quite a long way.


Selected new word of the month that I like: vitamin. Two selected new words of the month that I don’t like: me and mine. Why these?

You’ve become accustomed to having your vitamin every morning…whoever came up with gummy-vites should be a millionaire, because if you had your way, you would eat 10. It’s a habit that I hope you have forever because having you take your vitamin makes me feel a lot better about your health, like I am preventing what could be another cold. I am hoping that those have helped you through the last month.

As for “me” and “mine”, well I know you didn’t pick these up at home. When you say “me”, it’s never just once but about five or six times in a row – “me, me, me, me, me, me” – and I’ve seen you do it on numerous occasions like when you are at the top of the slide ready to go down. Are you wanting people to watch you? Do you want their attention? Or, are you just stating that it is your turn? I don’t think anyone would be able to cut in front of you once you are sitting and ready to go down the slide. And “mine”? I have just about had it with that one. I keep telling you that people need to share, which I assumed daycare would teach you since there are others there. But, when you see Olivia with a toy that may be hers or may be yours, you will take it away. Sometimes you are nice in my “you need to share” attempt and give it back. Other times you will get angry and start crying. Just yesterday you did it to test me, attempting to take away something from your sister four times. I hated to see you in tears, but I want you understand that the world would be a better place if people just learned to share things.


There’s another milestone that you did that amazed me this month. You said your name. It sounds more like “bweat – wos” right now, but I know it will get there. Last night you even said “Bea” which was clear, right after I said your name. You are saying so many different things, but some of it is very hard to understand. I can sense your frustration when I can’t understand and keep asking you to repeat. Then we both kind of give up. We’ll get there, I’m sure.


I think we also had a major accomplishment in the health department. You were sick, maybe once, the entire month. I say “maybe” only because it was a very mild runny nose. No fever, no coughing, nothing else. Other than that, you are getting teeth like a madwoman. I see molars, fangs, almost a full mouth of teeth. You also started picking your nose. We are slowly learning how to deal with such issues, but it does take some time, especially when you don’t like anyone touching your nose.


I’m summing up this last month to be quite a learning experience for us all. As each day creeps by, I see something new and amazing about you. I think to myself, “did she just do that?” No way. I want to hold on to you with everything I’ve got to make you stay little. I continue to learn with you and see the world in different ways, and for the most part, I am enjoying watching you grow into your own, with your own personality. I hope you keep dancing and singing and laughing because those are the most enjoyable parts about you that I love.

I love you more than any words I could write.

Love,
Mama (Mommy)

Little Helper

Though they will probably balk at this video when they are older, I have to say I love it. Olivia loves her "mixed veggie" baby food, and Bea is more than happy to shovel it in her mouth. And she is so darn proud! It's nice to have help where we can get it...

The Reason

Our BBQ was this last weekend, and while we were excited to have people over, I feared:

No one would show up
A lot of people would flake

One of my fears did come true. A lot of people flaked at the last minute, which is fine, because I don't like large crowds anyhow and was kind of freaking out at how many people might be at our house and said they would be. I guess what I was, and still am, bummed out about is that Bea and Olivia were the only children. I was looking forward to at least have someone play with Bea. I was sad. Still am. Why do I feel like I am competing to be among a popular crowd, if that is what it is? Who cares, right? I wish I didn't. I guess there were a lot of people that I wanted to see that were unable to make it. This is why I never do anything like this. I don't plan to do it again anytime soon.

I hate all the anticipation, all the cleaning, everything that leads up to throwing a party. I enjoyed having the people there that did come, don't get me wrong. It was a lot of fun, and some of the girls stayed and hung out, had drinks, made smores, helped clean up. It was nice to catch up with people and not have my eyes and ears focused completely on the girls because there were others around.

I originally planned to throw Bea a party for her second birthday. Now I am debating...It's a tough call. She's outgoing, and it would be good for her so I shouldn't let my fears and reasons get in the way. It's just hard not to.

Another Plug

So, you know how I mentioned that I really wanted a scarf off of this person's site? Well, Josh received a package in the mail from there two days later.

I got one of my birthday presents early! And, can I say that that the picture, even how great it looks on the site, didn't do it as much justice as having the real thing in my hot little hands? It is BEAUTIFUL!!!

We may have to get two more because look at the models below:



By the way, I failed to mention in my previous post that Dian made both Olivia and Bea blankets after their arrivals. The blankets are so beautiful that when I received Bea's, I immediately looked for the tag for the maker. She made them herself, and they were beautiful...Hey, D, maybe you should consider moving into the baby market? It's a money making machine!

Love Thursday

On days like today and yesterday when it is cold and dreary outside, I tend to think about both my daughters and their wintertime births. And on days like these, I realize how much time has passed and that it has gone by so quickly. As each day goes by, my love grows fonder and my heart grows bigger, and the feelings that I have for them are too hard to put into words.

You've GOT to be Kidding!

Last week at work on one of my trips to the bathroom I stopped and looked at myself in the mirror. A little too closely, perhaps. I was checking out my hair and roots because I keep telling myself everyday to pick up the phone and make a damn appointment already because I love my highlight/lowlight mix along with the "bangs that were a mistake" but really did a lot for me and now they look like I am trying to grow them out. Blech! (Note to self: when re-reading this post, please call to make an appointment this Friday, as you think you might be able to take the day off!)

Ok, what was I saying? Yes, my hair...I was looking at how much root exposure there was when I suddenly noticed something that was enlightning - yes, pun intended. It was a single hair. Bright in color. Not exactly blonde. Not exactly gray. It appeared white, and yes, it was growing from the root and was only about an inch or so long. I think I examined it for a few minutes or so while I debated to pull it out or leave it be.

If it's true what they say and ten more grow in its place then you will be the first to know, I promise. I had to pull that sucker out, I'm sorry! I'm really not that old, which led me to think:

-Did this come about from my new life as a mother over the last couple of years - all those sleepless nights, all of that general worry about something happening to my girls, all those sicknesses?

-Or, would it have happened regardless?

While I would like to believe that it would have happened regardless, I know that I'm probably wrong. If it really is a result of being a mother and all that I have endured over the last couple of years, then I wouldn't have it any other way. Because being a mother is like nothing else in the entire world and one that I would give up everything for.

And, hey, I can color my hair until I'm 100, if I still care about it at that point.

(SIDENOTE: Happy Birthday, Toddy!)

A Little Promotion

I normally wouldn't do anything like this (as far as blatantly promoting anything here - usually I am subtle), but last night we saw some old friends that we haven't seen in a long time. And maybe it's because I am jealous or maybe because I want to get her some new business, but Dian started her own business. She's turned her hobby into a business. Yes, I am jealous. I hate sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day...I'd rather be home being crafty, which I am not really good at. I have yet to find that hidden talent that I can so graciously turn into a real job that pays.

Anyway, she's got some cool items on her site...jewelry, scarves, stained glass...And my favorite, this scarf.

Last night the girls were on their best behavior (for the most part) when they were over. It was a great visit, one of which I hope there are many more to come in the future...at least more frequently than they have been in the past.

Beyond last night, you might be wondering what I did with my time alone on Friday night. I'll make this brief:

I walked around the mall like a lost puppy because as I went to all the shops I used to go to, I realized that they just weren't me anymore. I had been shopping in maternity stores for two years, people! I was completely lost.

I got Bea's Halloween costume.

Watched a flick with NO interruptions.

Talked to Mitchell for like an hour.

I got the girls outfits for this weekend, and other things, too. Is that so much a surprise?

Even more surprising is that my long list of things I needed to get done barely got touched...