Theys Got Some of Ma in 'Em

Title translation: Funktified Genes

About a month ago I got a pedicure while visiting my friends in San Diego. The pedicurist was fabulous, and she was definitely a professional. With over 15 years of experience, she told us she had worked at some of the top spa destinations across the nation. The woman knew feet. So, when she told my friend J and I that we should attempt to grow out our toenails, I knew that was what I had to do. She mentioned that it was fine to keep them short, but it would help the skin on the tips of our tootsies to not be so dry, getting rid of the abundance of dead skin. I guess I hadn't realized that the tips of my toes could actually have dry, dead skin on them. Shoot, if I am going to pay that much for a pedicure (that was SO worth the money), then I was going to try to follow any advice that I was given.

It's been pure torture for me to not mangle my toenails and shorten them to how I'm used to. It's been almost four weeks now. They have grown slowly, but they have grown a fair amount. And seeing the growth, I know why I have kept them short as long as I can remember. There is some "slight" downward curling of the toenails. I say slight now because I'm not sure how much curling there will be if I let them grow any longer. I'm not sure I'm going to let them.

This has been passed down to not just one, but both of our girls. I've never really thought much about why their toenails do the downward curl, and I believed it to be just one of those baby/infant things that they grow out of and become normal over time. I'm so wrong.

Let me just call your attention to some of the statements made (most in frustration) when it is nail clipping time in our house. "OMG! Why are these nails doing this??" "That must be painful." "Why are they curling downward?" "They're constantly ingrown...that's just not right." "Poor girls." "Is this normal???"

Apparently, it is normal because it came from me. I am sure that when Josh reads this he is going to laugh. Why? There is now an understandable reason for their toenails to be doing this, and it comes from my genes. I believe the girls are doomed to have toenails like mine. In fact, I’m sure they won’t change over time.

Oh, the horror...when they get older people are going to be looking at those toes in shock, covering their mouths and saying:

"Now that them there is a wallop of curlin’ toenails, eh? How's about joining that there circus thing?"

Keep those toenails short, girls. Keep them short and no one will ever know. It's our little secret (well, and anyone else's reading this...).