Olivia at 15 Months

Dear Livey,

You turned 15 months old last week, and I have to admit that this is the first time ever that I am late in writing this to you. I haven't had time, and this will be the only letter that is short, but sweet, to you.


It's certainly been a month of change for you. You are growing more and more into yourself and developing your personality. You have been a lot less grumpy, and more happy as you've become quite the speed crawler. I swear, if there were baby crawling races, you would win by a mile - especially if we put your bun-bun at the finish line! You're moving towards being upright walking, and I will have more to report on that next month. I've also never heard you laugh as much as you have in the past month. You are full of giggles and laughter, and believe me, there is much to smile about around our house.


With the happy times, we've also come across some challenges. You know how to be bad, which is not to say it isn't funny (because it most certainly is), but disciplining you at such a young age has been hard. So what are you doing that is so bad? You pull your sisters hair - constantly. You hit. Everyone. I don't know how and where you learned these things at such an early age, but it is challenging for us to control. The funny thing is that at daycare they taught you to say "no, no, no" while shaking a finger in the air. So we did that for awhile, but it was so cute that you would continue to do the bad things after imitating us. We've been pulling you away from the situation when you antagonize your sister, or when you hit, and say a stern "no", which immediately makes you cry. You get over it in a minute, so I know it is going to be ok.


You're forming more and more words, a lot that are very hard to understand, but it is easy to tell that you are learning what things mean. You often jibber jabber, a lot more so when your sister is not around, and sometimes you sing a song with no real words. There's this thing you do that I want to remember forever, because it gets to my heart in the biggest way possible. You often chant "mama" over and over to me, and then you poke me, pointing out that I am your mama. I love that. I love it so much that I say "Olivia" back to you and poke you in your tummy or side and you break out into hysterical laughter. There is no sweeter sound in the world.


I went away this last month for work. Your father said that in the evening you would sit by the front window and look out and say "mama". You'd say it as a question, like "when is mama coming home? Is she coming home?" He said you seemed confused. And when I did come home and greeted you at daycare I had never seen a smile so big, and a crawl so fast, and a pull up to me as you hugged me and wanted to be in my arms. I had missed you so much...You're growing so fast, and each day you grow up a little more before my eyes.

Your curls are getting curlier. Your smile is getting bigger. Your mind is getting smarter. You're becoming a little person, a little girl...and one that I can't wait to see every morning when I wake up because I want to spend time with you and see what new thing you might do.

I love you,
Mama

Isn't She Lovely?

That's one of my lifelong friends, P, from San Diego and her new husband. They got married in Spain last month and had the wedding reception at her mother's home in San Diego this last weekend. So, I was able to head down to my old roots and hang out with my girls L and J - we're going strong with 20 years of being friends. I wasn't able see P, only at the reception. But, amazingly enough, my friend J moved into the neighborhood where I grew up, and P's reception was at her mother's home in the same neighborhood, so we walked two very short blocks to the reception. It was a wild and quick weekend of hanging with the girls again, and I can't believe it's been 10 months since I was down there (Post #6: There's No Place Like Homes). Here's some more pics of me and the ladies. P is so beautiful...









The reception was amazing. They had taken dance lessons and did the waltz so perfectly for their first dance. Then, when P danced with her father, J and I started crying. It was just the sweetest thing. And then J had said to me "Do you remember when we would have slumber parties here 20 years ago and would make popcorn and yell at her parents to leave us alone while we watched movies all night? Did you EVER think that we would be sitting here 20 years later celebrating her marriage?" No way. There's so much history there. Hard to believe that you could be back in the same location many years later. These 3 friends. We have history, and we continue to make it throughout our lives.

When her mother saw us walk in, she freaked out and started crying. In her speech she mentioned how young she felt, and part of that had to do with seeing P's childhood friends and saying how we all still looked the same. She was such a happy mother, and I was so happy for her.

Anyway, now that I am back, I am fighting off a terrible cold but doing ok. I know that I haven't posted Olivia's 15 month letter and I am late. I never have been before. And it is filling me with anxiety. It will be posted this weekend sometime, and what won't be included is the reality that she is beginning to walk (because this happened just yesterday!). It is assisted, but it is walking. We give her a week to be walking on her own (and hopefully it won't be while we are on vacation next week!!!). I'm going to take some video tonight because it is the cutest little marching band walk, and oh, she is so proud.

Had I Have Known

Mornings around our house have been pretty typical these days, and the routine has been pretty much the same but also getting easier on me as Bea is much more independent and Olivia can play in her crib or crawl around if I need a bit more time in getting ready. I'm alone with both girls in the mornings, and since my new workplace is flexible on when I get into the office, I now take my time with them in the morning. This morning things seemed to go as planned and I was actually ready and waiting for them to get up around 7:15. Olivia got up first. Then Bea.

Olivia was looking for snuggles this morning because she still seemed tired. And I happen to love that and take advantage of every single minute I get of it these days because it won't be much longer until...well, you know, they just grow up so fast. So she is laying on me, head on my shoulder, body sprawled out across my chest and stomach. And we are talking back to each other in her language. Suddenly I feel a weird warmth. And then it feels wet. And I am thinking "NO WAY! She did not do that. She's got a DIAPER on!" She did. I should have changed her night diaper before snuggling. And wow, it was a lot of pee. And then part of me wonders if she planned that all out, because well, we all know that Olivia is a little bit of drama at times and likes to cause chaos by throwing us for these loops every now and again. So, I can only wonder what my little girl was thinking while this happened.

Things brings me to the #7 post: An Unheard Conversation

Mother's Day and the Countdown to 1

I hope that all the mother’s reading this had a great mother’s day. And hugs to my friend K who celebrated her very first mother’s day this year. This is my third. I can’t even believe that. I was awoken by Bea yelling “Happy Mother’s Day” over and over, while Olivia crawled up to my face and poked me saying “Mama”. I then got a sweet card, roses, coffee, a paper, and breakfast. And a family that made me smile all morning long. It really was great, and I really feel that there is no better feeling than being a mom (well, most of the time anyway).

So, my anniversary is coming up, or rather my blogiversary. I can’t believe I have been doing this almost a year now, though not as consistent in recent months. Anyway, there are quite a few posts that are near and dear to me, though I don’t know the exact number offhand. I’ll be starting the countdown at 8 and hope that it will match up. So, at number 8 comes a post that I wrote my first month in doing this blog. And because I don’t think she ever saw it and therefore want to her to see it, it is sort of a tribute to my friend M. And some of the things I wish I would have done and realized a long time ago. And, oh my gosh, I SO understand now.

Number 8: This Last Weekend

Beatrice at 2 Years, 4 Months

Dear Beatrice,

Today you are two years and four months old.

This last month has been less about me, and more about your father. You've been attached to him at the hip, let's say. Everywhere he goes, you want to go, and the words I heard most from you this month are "I go with daddy." It was neverending, almost to the point where I wanted to say "pay attention to me! I'm your mother!" I never did, though, because I just couldn't.


I went away for a few days for work this month. And because it has been a big daddy month for you, I didn't really think that you would miss me. I spoke to you on the phone, but you didn't seem too interested, only telling me what you were doing that moment and that you loved me. It was nice to hear your voice and I wanted to run home to you and hold you in my arms. But, I couldn't. When I did come home, I decided to surprise you by picking you up at daycare. It had been a few days since we had seen each other. I wasn't expecting much when I got there, but I don't think I have ever seen you so happy to see me ever. You were so happy, came running to me, gave me kisses and hugs, then proceeded to tell me all this stuff you had done. You wouldn't leave my side. And you didn't for a few days after. Your father said you were confused about me not being around, but I have to say that I enjoyed the welcome home more than anything.


You've become a big singer over the last few months. You pretty much know all of the words to a number of songs. So, if you start singing one and finish it, you will jump right into another. It's really cute. You say "yeah!" after every one, and you always get an applause. The song you sing the most is "Happy Birthday", and whenever I ask you who's birthday it is, you always say that it is Olivia's. I swear, your sister has had so many birthdays that you think she would be older than me! In any case, when I took you to daycare yesterday, I could tell you didn't want me to leave. So, the moment we got inside you started singing the itsy bitsy spider. Then ABCs. Then twinkle, twinkle little star. Then happy birthday. Then you started all over again. I had to sneak out, but I swear I could have sat there all day and listened to you sing the day away.


You're talking more and more in full sentences. Last night one of your father's friends came over and you starting talking to him, and his reaction was that he couldn't believe you were saying sentences now. You're still just this little person, and to hear you talking like an adult, albeit small words but in long sentences, is pretty amazing. I look at you now and think that you are so much like a little girl. Where did all the time go?


You continue to grow. You continue to learn. You continue to amaze me each and every day. I love you, Bea.

Love,
Mama

Just the Oddest Thing

It’s that time of year. I was pregnant at this time for two years in a row just a few years ago. Last year I got a break, and you know what happened? I felt as though I had morning sickness during this time last year. I don’t know if it is the weather and the fact that my body was used to being pregnant at this time of the year, but I just feel awful. It kicked in on me a few days ago, too, though not as bad as last year. It’s just the strangest thing. And I know I’m not pregnant, though it does make me sentimental of that time.

To Josh

On May 1, 1997, we shared our first kiss.

On May 5, 2001, we were married.

Ten years together. Six years married. Two little baby girls later...

My life could not be more complete without you in it. And I would not have the beautiful, loving family that makes me so incredibly happy every single day.

Happy Anniversary to my one, and only...The best is still yet to come.